ANOTHER NEW YEAR, ANOTHER NEW RESOLUTION

 

Each new year begins with a clean slate. We look at is as our chance to start over, to get it right this time, or to improve ourselves in some way. To me this suggests that we are imperfect to start with. This year I have decided that instead of making a list of things that I want to improve about myself and beating myself up if I fail, I’m simply going to like myself just as I am.  So instead of making a list of what I want to change, I’m going to make a list of the things I like about myself.

ADVENTURES:  This is a part of myself that I’ve discovered in the past few years when I started writing. My books are usually set in a Canadian landscape and a lot of action takes place outdoors. Because of this I have felt compelled to explore it by learning to hike, kayak, canoe, and bike. I love it still and long for my next adventure.

WORKING OUT: Ever since I was a chubby teen in high school, I decided I wanted to lose weight, so put myself on a diet and started exercising. I later moved on to jogging, teaching fitness at the YMCA, and later biking, etc. I also work out every day in my basement gym and love it. It is a part of my life that I will never give up because it makes me feel amazing.

I’D RATHER COMPETE AGAINST MYSELF THAN SOMEONE ELSE: I like to set my own guidelines about how I will evolve. I hate having anyone else tell me what I must do to succeed or be a better person. I am insightful enough to see what needs to change and disciplined enough to do it.

FAMILY: I am so proud of the family life my husband and I have built for our children. We have a great relationship with both of our kids and are proud of who they have become. When anyone asks how we did that, I reply, “They came to us this way. We just helped them to be themselves.”

FRIENDSHIP: Just as my family means the world to me, so do my friends. I am there for them in good times and bad, and I am happy to say that my friends are willing to work through the tough stuff with me as well. This suggests that I am as important to them as they are to me. That is everything to me.

I LOVE WRITING: I see my writing life as a vocation not a job. It is something that keeps calling me back whenever I stray. In fact, I’m miserable when I’m not writing. I love telling stories that inspire women and make them feel less alone and perhaps think that anything is possible.

CLOTHES: For a long time, I was embarrassed that I, not only like nice clothes, but that I have an extensive wardrobe. “Another new outfit,” people would utter, which made me feel shallow and extravagant. No more. I now accept that I like nice new clothes and often change my style. It’s nobody’s business but my own. I embrace this part of myself.

I AM ORGANIZED & DISCIPLINED: I put these two together because, for me, they go hand in hand. As a writer, it is necessary to be both organized and disciplined. It takes time and effort to gather research for my books. Then I must decide what part of my research I want to weave it into my narrative. No easy task. It takes discipline to turn up at my desk every day and work on the same project for years at a time. But the result gives me an incredible feeling of satisfaction and purpose. And that is an important need that I am happy to fill through my writing.

AT THIS POINT YOU MAY THINK I’M FULL OF MYSELF by sharing the things I like about myself. But at this stage of my life, what someone else thinks of me is not my concern.  As human beings, we too often put ourselves down for what we are not, or for places where we could do better. We’ve been told not to be selfish or full of ourselves. The media tells us that we will be perfect if we just do what they want us to do, usually by buying their product. But what if we toss that all aside, and just revel in the things we actually like about ourselves? What would that feel like? And where would it take us in the year ahead? If it takes us nowhere new, well that’s okay because it’s a pretty damn good place to be. But I’m willing to bet that a positive attitude about us will take us in new directions. Because, let’s face it, life changes every day, and so do we. So, if I’m to have a new year’s resolution this year, it’s to LIKE MYSELF JUST THE WAY I AM.